October 27, 2016

some days, like today, i wonder if i’m depressed. i wonder if i’m going down that slope again.

i wonder if its the lower dose of hormones, i wonder if its just everything mounting and accumulating, if its cos i havent been going for yoga, or writing my gratitude journal. i dont know how good or bad revisiting the past is – the simple act of having to gather money or the talk on depression reminding me of the crap i went through. i dont know. one things

so what do i do? i turn back to writing. i wonder why i can express all these feelings. but cannot copyright. well actually i tink i know why. mental block. leftover phobia from the clearbridge days.

i guess there is alot of fear being circulated in my system these days and perhaps i havent quite figured out how to deal with them. shelf? experience? i kinda want to spend as much time with g as possible before he flies off, so i guess for now these things will have to take a back seat.







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